Over the past few years, I’ve been told by several people in various situations, that I have a “calming effect” on them. It always makes me laugh because I know my mind and “calm” is not necessarily the right description. The calm before the storm, maybe.
Usually, I just write it off to the fact that I’m soft-spoken, polite, (you know, just your basic ‘decent human being’ stuff which has become something of a lost art.) But tonight it happened again, a stranger I interacted with who started off by saying they had had a “long day”, later randomly mentioned this calming effect again.
It got me thinking, maybe I should stop ignoring these little messages from the universe and start using my calming superpowers for the greater good. I have a feeling the world could use some calming energy right about now and in the years ahead. Not sure what that means for me exactly, but I think I’m open to finding out.
When I wrote this on social media, someone commented: “It’s the balancing your being brings.. most people just don’t know what to call it.” It helped me to fine-tune this thing because I realized they were right.
In these moments, it’s usually me just “being” and the other person allowing themselves to share this space with me till we find some kind of balance. In tonight’s case we were forced to occupy the same space for a while so they had to adjust. In extreme situations, when people are way off to the other edge of the stress spectrum, my so-called calming energy can sometimes be overwhelming for them and they resist it even more. In those cases there is just no possibility for balance.
Anyway, that’s it. Namaste, bitches. (This calming thing comes and goes.)
It’s one of those mornings where I’m torn between the beauty and the sadness of it all…
#coldautumnday #leavesarefallingonmeasiwritethis #itallmeaningmylifeandlifeitself
Cats teach me everything I need to know about life:
- Eat well
- Sleep well
- Act like you own the place
- Seek adventures
- Get pampered
- Be beautiful
- Take naps
- Shower often
- Enjoy the moment
- Know when to stop giving a fuck.
Another piece of me died the other day. I realized that many of the “spiritual” things I have chosen to believe existed have never really been proven. Not by science, but more importantly, not even by myself. Psychic abilities, spirit guides, reincarnation, extraterrestrial communication, soul contracts, multi-dimensional realities, etc, etc – I spent my entire life believing in these things and defending them to others without ever really having any of my own proof or personal experience.
Ever since I was a kid this world was never enough for me. Always needing more, always searching for more. And now, TROLOLOL, the joke was on me because apparently my real life mission was to accept that this is all there is and to find the beauty and magic in it. It took me half my life to discover my real mission, and I suppose the rest of my life to implement it. Who knows, maybe once I surrender to what already is and find my peace with it, the other things I’ve been searching for will just open themselves naturally to me. Or maybe it wont even matter anymore whether or not they are true.
“I’m convinced that I come from a place where there is no concept of ‘earning a living’. All beings just exist and ‘be’ in peace. Earth is the only planet where we have to ‘pay’ to survive. I have a hard time fitting in.
People say ‘do what you like’, I like to just be and not do.”
– Neha Sinha
“I was looking out of the window in New York and everybody was rushing around, almost running. Everybody seemed to be in a state of intense nervous tension, anxiety. It’s suffering, really, but it’s not recognized as suffering. And I thought, where are they all running to? And of course, they are all running to the future. They are needing to get somewhere, which is not here. It is a point in time: not now—then. They are running to a then. They are suffering, but they don’t even know it.”
The moment one gives close attention to anything, even a blade of grass, it becomes a mysterious, awesome, indescribably magnificent world in itself.
– Henry Miller
This is a practice that i have found pretty interesting and i wanted to share. I call it the “Bedtime Comfort Challenge.”
Basically when you go to bed each night, you ask yourself: “What can I do to be even more comfortable than i am right now?”
If you listen to your body closely you will always find more and more things you can do to feel even more comfortable. It could mean changing positions, or spreading your legs a little more, or noticing your jaw is tense and relaxing it, or relaxing your forehead, or moving your arm a little more to the left, or shifting a boob… You get the picture. You ask yourself that question again and again and act accordingly until you are so comfortable that you are practically melting into the mattress.
If you repeat this process on a regular basis, you’ll benefit in 4 ways:
1) You practice bringing yourself into the NOW. In those moments, you are not lost in thought, reviewing the previous day or worrying about the next one, you are here and now, in this bed, in this moment.
2) You start training yourself to bring your awareness down into the body and to what it needs. For many of us, we are so ‘in our heads’ most of the time that often we forget there is a body attached.
3) You start getting used to paying attention to what makes you feel good, and to go in the direction of it. As that becomes more habitual, you’ll see it apply to other things in your life as well – finding the thoughts, words or actions that feel good to you and going in the direction of them.
4) Its just really freaking comfortable and relaxing, and our bodies, minds and souls deserve that.. 🙂
If you can’t figure out what you were meant to do in this life, figure out what you were meant to do in this moment.
– Shira Tamir
New Teal Swan remix based on the Santa Fe workshop I attended in June 2013. Hope you enjoy it, and please share if you do!
Psychologist Nicholas Humphrey has proposed that our ability to awe was biologically selected for by evolution because it imbues our lives with sense of cosmic significance that has resulted in a species that works harder not just to survive but to flourish and thrive.
People often wonder what they could possibly do about all the suffering and conflict they see in the world. Well, here’s your TO DO list (aka S.R.S.E.) :
1) SIT DOWN (Rest for a minute)
2) RELAX (stop worrying and being afraid)
3) SMELL THE COFFEE (enjoy the moment, be here now, bask in presence)
4) ENJOY THE RIDE (Let go and have fun!)
The truth is, this is the only thing you or anyone else can do about it. If you are able to bring that kind of peace and surrender into your daily existence, then you are bringing it into all of humanity. Because you are humanity; humanity is the sum of its parts.
Last night I went for a walk with an Eckhart Tolle lecture sinking in through my mp3 (what can I say , I’m a groupie!!!)
I was approaching the Tel Aviv Port just as E.T. was in his motivational peak (for those familiar with Eckhart you know he’s not exactly a “motivational speaker” but that the real power lies in the peaceful simplicity of his words.)
Anyway, just as E.T. was encouraging me to “embrace the moment”, “be here Now”, “surrender to the present moment, no matter what form it may take”, “SURRENDER TO THE NOW”, his voice started drowning out to the sound of samba music coming from a large crowd of people standing along the port.
I then realized that what E.T. was really trying to say was “Oh, for god sake, take off the damn earphones, stop listening to me blabbing on about surrendering and embrace the present moment already!!!”
And so I did.
As I approached the crowd I realized that it was a huge samba party with people of all ages line dancing to the beat of the samba drums, following the lead of some dance trainers who were demonstrating the moves.
As with any type of similar situation, there were the people who were actually participating (and I must say, having the time of their lives..) and then there was the rest of the on-lookers circling the event, safely smiling and clapping away as the others got their grooves on.
I was with the on-lookers.
I was looking at the dancers, at how much fun they were having, and yet all I could hear was Eckhart’s words echoing in my ears: “SURRENDER!”
But I couldn’t.
The next couple of minutes consisted of a unique inner dialogue with myself (as a typical Gemini, I’ve gotten quite good at those) which consisted basically of this:
– No, I can’t…
– But you want to!
– No, I’m shy…
– Just do it!
– But I don’t know the steps..
– No one here knows the steps.. they’re learning as they go!
– But what if someone I know will see me?
– So what?
– What if they notice that I’m here all alone?
– Who cares????
– Hey I know, I’ll come back next week with my husband.. It will probably be much more fun with him anyway… Yeah, that’s what I’ll do!
– You chicken.
Ok, you get the point.
But here’s where the real magic started:
All of a sudden I noticed a little girl and her mom who were standing nearby. The mom was trying to encourage the girl to dance and the girl kept shying away. Each time the mom would gently nudge her, the girl would consider it for a moment, and then finally she would shy away clinging on to her mommy’s leg.
At that moment, I INSTANTLY had a flashback to my childhood where unfortunately I had been in so many similar situations: people encouraging me to dance or play or participate or sing (I sooo wanted to do that) .. and almost every single time I would eventually shy away, disappointing the people around me, but most importantly… disappointing myself.
And then suddenly it hit me:
I’M NOT THAT LITTLE GIRL ANYMORE! I don’t have to be that little girl anymore!! It is just my conditioned mind trying to take over, trying to convince me that this is something I wasn’t capable of doing.. that I was “too shy”. (Yes, those hours listening to Eckhart’s lectures were finally starting to pay off.)
As I was having this enlightenment, I noticed more and more people around me had started to join in the line dance. It was like a wave coming in and I knew that I could not stand in place any longer.. that if ever I wanted to prove something to myself I would need to do it NOW.
“JUST TAKE THE FIRST STEP”, that little voice inside me thundered over the music.
And so I did.
I took the first step and the next thing I know I was dancing to beat, shaking my booty along with the best of them…
And I was having FUN!
But that’s not the end of this story:
Just as I was starting to really enjoy myself, I suddenly noticed (now, get this…) the same little girl I had seen before, was now looking directly at me (out of all the other people in the crowd) and trying to copy my dance moves!!
I smiled to her and she smiled back this sweet, shy smile and before I knew it I was heading over to her (dancing as I went) and yelled to her, “Come dance with me!” She giggled and shied away, running back to her mom. And I continued dancing with the others till the end of the song.
When the song was over, I headed out of the crowd, but not before bumping into the little girl and her mother once again.
Before I could say a word, her mother gave me this huge smile and yelled “THANK YOU!” over the music (I guess she noticed me trying to get her daughter to dance.) I looked down at the little girl and told her, “You know, you’re a really great dancer! I SAW you!”
The girl looked back at me with her big brown eyes and beautiful smile and I could tell she was so pleased with herself when I said that.
Again, her mother thanked me and told me that I have a beautiful smile.
As I thanked her back I realized that I had just made a difference in that little girl’s life. That even though I was a perfect stranger, maybe I had succeeded in encouraging her to let go and feel good about herself.
Her mother looked at me like I was a human angel that appeared out of nowhere.
What her mother didn’t know was that all of this would have never been possible if it wasn’t for her little girl gently nudging ME on to face my fears.
Her daughter was MY angel.
And for that I shall be eternally grateful.